Cernunnos: The Horned God
Cernunnos is pictured on the Gundustrop Cauldron as a human with the antlers of a young stag, receiving wisdom from the wild creatures at his side. He brings what I call "WildMind," a fully present awareness of one's own Divine Presence, the other Beings creating the moment, and the intention or task at hand. He also brings a shape-shifter's ecstatic sense of one's own vitality and aliveness, an appreciation for one's own strength and grace, and delight in the sensual experience of the world. In his hand he holds a torque, an open circlet that represents the archetype of the tension between commitment and liberty, or civility and wildness.
The Horned God is traditionally born at the Winter Solstice, and is the Springtime lover of the great creator Goddess. He brings us the ability to be passionate, devoted lovers without surrendering our sovereignty and becoming a slave, and as such invites us to create interdependent relationship forms in which adults can be both responsible and free. The serpent in his other hand is, like the dragon of Michael, a symbol of mastery of the unconscious self, and the power the self-Master wields in the world.
With Cernunnos, let us be present in each moment, consciously co-creating it!
What does Being Present in the Moment Look Like in a Love Relationship?
Again, I turn to the wisdom of Dr. Sue Johnson, who notes in Hold Me Tight that emotional presence has three key components:
Accessible -- staying open and available to your partner even when you feel insecure
Responsive -- Sending clear signals of comfort and caring when your partner needs them
Engaged -- giving that special kind of attention that we give only to a loved one
Perhaps the absence of these three elements of emotional presence sounds familiar...
Distant -- shutting partner out when you feel insecure; failing to interact or communicate
Dismissive -- Ignoring or minimizing partner's emotions or needs
Distracted -- thinking about something (or someone!) else, checking your phone, or checking out
These principles apply not just to emotional conversations but also to other "transactions." If we ARE A.R.E. (Accessible, Responsive, and Engaged) with our loved ones, then we are picking up the slack when they are overwhelmed by work, helping figure out a financial crisis, and making clear that they are the one we most want to spend time with. We are also being conscious and clear with our requests of each other, rather than waiting for our anger to tell us that we have unconsciously been the victim of an unconscious partner.
When we A.R.E. with each other, life is an improvisational energetic dance, with our "3-point attention" (or "WildMind" as I like to call it) focused on our own heart center (God Soul), the point of connection between us, and the intention of the dance we are co-creating. The work of Generosity and Gratitude is about the CONTACT -- which is where we ARE real.
So make every interaction a Key of Remembrance, and remember the only moments you have truly lived are those in which you are actually there. When we ARE living life fully Accessible, Responsive, and Engaged we ARE living life ALIVE and fully present, not just for our human partners and allies, but for the BELOVED Beings co-creating with us in each moment.